W.I.N. Wednesday: You don't have to be a podcaster.

Last week I was corresponding with friend and mentor Chip Huth about his new podcast with Tanner brock called Changing Discourse. Changing Discourse launches tomorrow (November 5) so be sure to check it out on any of the podcast platforms. Between Tanner and Chip’s connections I guarantee there will be some amazing guests. Chip commented on how he didn’t realize how much work goes into doing a podcast, and how much he was enjoying the process. 

Having done 275 hour long interviews in the last 5 years for the Excellence in Training Academy and another 100 hour long interviews for the ILEETA Learning Lab in the last 3 years I can attest to how much work goes into preparing for those interviews. As part of the preparation I will read articles and books written by the person I am going to interview. I will also watch and listen to interviews and videos of presentations they have done for a variety of platforms. All of this preparation is so I can hopefully ask intelligent questions of my guest and make the best use of his or her time and energy. I often learn as much or more from the preparation, as I do from the interview. 

All this being said, you do not have to have a Membership Site or a Podcast for you to start doing interviews.  If you are interested in creating a culture of learning in your organization, interviews would be one way to do that. Sit down and make a list of people you would like to interview.  It can be people in your own organization where you interview them about their experiences, philosophies, and favorite books, podcasts and TED or TEDx talks. It can be authors, leaders, coaches, researchers, entrepreneurs and others you would like to interview in order to enhance your learning and bring value to your co-workers and your organization. These interviews do not have to be 2 or 3 hours like some of Jocko Willink or Tim Ferris’ podcasts or 60 minutes like the interviews I do.  They might be 15 or 20 minutes of good, solid content.  These interviews can be video interviews, or audio only. I do audio only so people don’t have to worry about hair, makeup, background, or lighting. 

If you are going to do this be sure to do your homework up front. This includes researching the platform you will use to record the interviews, how you are going to schedule the interviews and how you are going to distribute the recordings . All this is in addition to the research on your guests. Let your guest know how long the interview will be, who the audience is and whether it will be distributed strictly in house in your organization or on a public platform. Also be willing to provide them a copy of the interview that they can use and share as they see fit. 

Be prepared for people to say no, or simply not respond to your interview request. It is usually not about you so don’t take it personally. People have busy lives and this is one more demand for their time and energy. If they say no, thank them for considering the request and move on. 

Interviews can be a great way to gain and distribute knowledge, insights and wisdom within your organization. It is also a great way for you to continually learn. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.daretobegreatleadership.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Two Desires

In his September 3, 2020, 3-2-1- Thursday post James Clear shared the following passage from the book The Web of Belief by Willard Van Orman Quine and J.S. Ullian. I had to read through it a few times to let myself digest the distinction between the desire to be right and the desire to have been right. 

"The desire to be right and the desire to have been right are two desires, and the sooner we separate them the better off we are. The desire to be right is the thirst for truth. On all counts, both practical and theoretical, there is nothing but good to be said for it. The desire to have been right, on the other hand, is the pride that goeth before a fall. It stands in the way of our seeing we were wrong, and thus blocks the progress of our knowledge.”

Upon reflection it struck me that the desire to “be right” involves the curiosity to continually be reading, listening, questioning, reflecting and learning to discover the truth based on the research and the evidence, not based on what you want it to be. It also requires the humility to raise your hand and say, “I don’t know.” Or “I don’t understand.” Speaker, leader, entrepreneur and former Navy Seal Clint Bruce refers to this as “Intellectual Courage”. He distinguishes Intellectual Courage from Physical Courage. He says there is an element of necessity to physical courage where Intellectual Courage is escapable. All you have to do is not raise your hand and no one will know that you didn’t know. 

We have all likely fallen prey to the desire to “have been right”. I know I have. The danger as pointed out by Willard Van Orman Quine and J.S. Ullian in that it “blocks the progress of our knowledge”. It stands in the way of us actively seeking the truth and shifts us to a defensive posture or a posture where we are trying to attack others beliefs to prove they are wrong. Not only will this block the progress of our knowledge it will block all positive progress, change and growth and mire us in conflict. 

What’s Important Now? Embrace curiosity and demonstrate intellectual courage by embracing the desire to be right.  

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.daretobegreatleadership.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: If You Are Ever Tempted

“If you are ever tempted to look for outside approval, realize that you have compromised your integrity. If you need a witness, be your own.”

Epictetus

It is easy to find yourself looking for outside approval. Looking for approval from your “Friends” and “Followers” on social media, from your boss, from peers or the audience to whom you are speaking. 

The problem with looking for outside approval is the temptation to make compromises to get that approval. Those compromises might mean doing or saying what is popular instead of taking a stand for what is right. It might mean failing to speak up on an important topic at a meeting and expressing concerns with the plan of action proposed by the boss. It might mean ignoring inappropriate behaviour or comments. 

In the Dare to Be Great leadership workshop I talk about Brene Brown’s three elements of Integrity:

1. Choosing Courage over Comfort.

2. Choosing What’s Right over What’s Fun, Fast or Easy

3. Practicing Your Values, not just Preaching Your Values. 

Prior to this definition we discuss the definitions of Bravery and Courage from Jack Colwell and Charles (Chip) Huth:

• Bravery is to act for what is right, at risk to yourself, when members of your social group agree with the act.

• Courage is to act for what is right, at risk to yourself, when members of your social group do not agree with the act. 

With this definition of Courage the risk is rarely a physical risk. It is a risk that people will be upset with you, talk about you behind your back, label you or blacklist you. 

In order to practice your values, you must be clear on your values. These are both your personal Core Values as well as the Core Values of your organization. Values are guiding principles and Core Values are the guiding principles at the heart of the person or organization. Your personal Core Values should align with those of the organization where you work. 

Understanding the definition of Courage and the three elements of Integrity are part of understanding and applying the two Guiding Questions in the Dare to Be Great philosophy:

1.    What’s Important Now?

2.    What’s the right thing to do?

What’s Important Now? Use the two questions as a guide and be your own witness. 

Note: Go to www.daretobegreatleadership.com to check out the weekly blog post and use the code WINSubscriber to get 10% off the Dare to Be Great: Strategies for Creating a Culture of Leadership online workshop. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Begin to speak when .......

"I begin to speak only when I'm certain that what I'll say isn't better left unsaid."

Cato

What’s Important Now? Enough said. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.daretobegreatleadership.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: A Better Question

James Hollis Ph.D. suggests that major personal decisions should be made not by asking, “Will this make me happy?” but “Will this choice enlarge me or diminish me?” 

That is a powerful reframe of what is likely a common question. Making decisions based on what we think will make us happy can be a slippery slope as it can be very short sighted. If in fact it does make you “happy” it is often a fleeting feeling. 

The question, “Will this choice enlarge me or diminish me?” is more of a big picture, long term thinking question and in line with the W.I.N. philosophy. It is more likely to result in choices that will help you to grow and develop in alignment with your core values and guiding principles. 

What’s Important Now? When making major personal decisions be sure to ask a better question. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Starving for Wisdom

“We are drowning in information, while starving for wisdom.”

E. O. Wilson

Information is more readily available and abundant now than at any time in history. You carry a super computer in your pocket. You are continually inundated with information through your e-mail and social media links and 24-hour news channels.

According to some sources until1900, human knowledge doubled approximately every century, by 1950 human knowledge doubled every 25 years, in 2000 human knowledge doubled every year and now, our knowledge is almost doubling every day.

“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.”

Confucius

Wisdom is different from information in that it requires us to study, pause, reflect, question, connect, discuss, debate, apply and assess. It requires us to seek to connect the dots between thoughts, ideas and information in order to find meaningful ways to apply the information in different fields. It requires the patience to stick with a problem and not just jump at the first possible answer.  

“The teacher who is indeed wise does not bid you to enter the house of his wisdom but rather leads you to the threshold of your mind.”

Khalil Gibran

The great teachers in your life and throughout history challenge you to think. They ask you questions to guide you to self-discovery, instead of simply giving you the answer. They are humble enough to say, “I don’t know.” And encourage you to continue to seek a deeper understanding. 

“Any fool can know. The point is to understand.” 
Albert Einstein

Wisdom is not about rote memory of facts and data. It is about the examination, exploration and questioning of information and ideas so you can gain an understanding. 

Two of the challenges in seeking wisdom are:

1.    Being humble enough to enable curiosity.

2.    Determining where to spend your time and energy. You need to decide what topics, ideas and information to study and seek understanding and which ones it ok to simply look up on your phone when you need that information. 

Mastering these two challenges itself requires wisdom. 

What’s Important Now? Seek wisdom, not just information. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: The enabler of curiosity.

“Humility is the enabler of curiosity.”

Jay Hennessey

Curiosity is critical to learning, understanding and growth. 

Curiosity requires the humility to ask questions, seek knowledge, seek understanding, seek new connections, and seek new teachers and sources of information. 

Curiosity requires the humility to say, “I don’t know.” or “I don’t understand.”

Curiosity requires the humility to be silent and listen in order to learn from others. 

Curiosity requires the humility to learn from people younger than you, people who may have less formal education than you or who may have less status in your organization that you. 

Curiosity requires the humility for the teacher to learn from the student. 

Curiosity requires the humility to keep a beginners mind and accept there is always more to learn.

Curiosity requires the humility to seek a new room if you feel that you are the smartest person in the room. 

Curiosity requires the humility to follow the advice of John Wooden, “Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who will argue with you.”

Curiosity requires the humility to surround yourself with unread books to remind yourself how much you still have to learn. 

What’s Important Now? Stay Humble. Stay Curious. 

P.S. If you are curious about The Dare to Be Great online leadership workshop, go to www.daretobegreatleadership.ca and use the code WINSubscriber to get 10% off the workshop price. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: 3-2-1. Things to ponder read and listen to.

Three quotes to ponder:

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."

Walter Winchell 

“The greatest obstacle to knowledge is not ignorance; it is the illusion of knowledge.”

Daniel Boorstin

“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you in trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”

Mark Twain

Two Book Recommendations:

Why We Get Sick: The Hidden Epidemic at the Root of Most Chronic Disease―and How to Fight It By Benjamin Bikman Ph.D. 

Think Like a Rocket Scientist: Simple Strategies You Can Use to Make Giant Leaps in Work and Life By Ozan Varol

If you are not a big reader you can find interviews with Benjamin Bikman talking about the impact of insulin resistance on our health (he also has an informative Instagram page) online. I enjoyed his interview with Max Lugavere for The Genius Life podcast. There are also interviews online with Ozan Varol talking about the value of thinking like a rocket scientist. I enjoyed his interview with Brett McKay for The Art of Manliness podcast. 

A Scientist Worth Listening to:

I have watched or listened to 14 interviews with Andrew Huberman Ph.D. over the last number of months and spent time on his Instagram page watching a number of the short videos he posts to explain neuroscience. Huberman is a professor in the Department of Neurobiology at the Stanford University School of Medicine. I am interested in gleaning information and strategies from Huberman’s work that I can incorporate into my training programs. I like Huberman’s way of explaining the functions of the brain and the nervous system and his commitment to get the message out to those of us who are not academics. If you do a search for “Andrew Huberman interviews” you will find at least 20 interviews he has done over the past two or three years. I personally got a lot out of the interviews for the Maxout podcast with Ed Mylett, Broken Brain with Dhru Purohit, Spartan Up with Joe De Sena and the Rich Roll podcast. You can likely find an interview done by your favorite podcaster. 

What’s Important Now? There is value in spending time pondering, reading, listening, reflecting, learning and striving to connect the dots between what you are learning and what you learned previously. 

P.S. Take advantage of the 10% discount as a W.I.N. Newsletter subscriber when you sign up for the Dare to Be Great: Strategies for Creating a Culture of Learning online workshop at www.daretobegreatleadership.ca using the code WINSubscriber. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: The normal of now.

I am not a fan of the term “the new normal”, I just struggled with better terminology or a better explanation. Then along comes Seth Godin imparting his wisdom in one of his daily blogs titled A new normal, where he addresses this. In that post he explains:

We’ve got a deep-seated desire for things to go back to normal, the way we were used to.

But this, this moment of ours is now normal.

For now.

And then, there will be another normal.

There is no “the new normal”. Because that’s definitive.

There’s simply the normal of now.

The world is different today than it was 6 months ago. That was also true a year ago, 5 years ago, 50 years ago and 100 years ago. It will also be true a year from now, 5 years from now, etc. 

We live in a world that is constantly changing, surrounded by people who are constantly changing. Some of those people are growing as part of that change and others are just changing as a natural part of the aging process with little or no personal growth. 

So, as always, it comes down to a choice; how you choose to spend your time in the now normal. You can sit around hoping things will go back to the way they were (which they will not), or you can put in the work to make the most of the world, and your piece of the world, in the normal of now, understanding it will continue to change whether you like it or not. 

What’s Important Now? You can do the Work, or you can Whine, both start with the same letter and both are a choice. Which you choose will determine the direction you move in the now normal of tomorrow and beyond. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: What makes a winner?

"If you ask me how I want to be remembered, it is as a winner. You know what a winner is? A winner is somebody who has given his best effort, who has tried the hardest they possibly can, who has utilized every ounce of energy and strength within them to accomplish something. It doesn't mean that they accomplished it or failed, it means that they've given it their best. That's a winner."

Walter Payton

I was a huge fan of Walter Payton. I loved watching him play for the Chicago Bears (yes I am old enough to have watched him play for the Bears). After reading about him I was even more impressed with his work ethic and attitude about life. I believe that Walter Payton understood being a winner was about the effort and the process, not just the outcome. Walter Payton died of a rare liver disease in 1999 at the age of 45, but he left a tremendous legacy. 

As I have talked and written about on numerous occasions, effort and process are what you need to focus on, as they are what you control. You do not control outcomes. Being willing to do the work and focusing on effort will provide you the best opportunity to achieve your desired outcome. 

“My bench never heard me mention winning. My whole emphasis was for each one of my players to try to learn to execute the fundamentals to the best of their ability. Not to try to be better than somebody else, but to learn from others, and never cease trying to be the best they could be; that's what I emphasized more than anything else.”

John Wooden

John Wooden is a coaching legend for his nearly 30 years coaching the UCLA Bruins. He is in the NCAA Hall of Fame as both a player and a coach. In his final 12 years at UCLA they won 10 National Championships. John Wooden never talked to his players about winning. John Wooden was all about character, effort and process.

“Winning and losing aren't all they're cracked up to be, but the trip to the destination is.”

John Wooden

 Andrew Huberman is a neuroscientist and tenured professor in the Department of Neurobiology at the Stanford University School of Medicine. One of the things Huberman talks about in all the interviews I have listened to is the importance of tying dopamine release to effort. You do this by rewarding yourself for making the effort to get better. He says that Growth Mindset involves deriving dopamine release from the effort and strain of the process, and enjoying the friction. He encourages us to think in terms of process, not events and verbs, not nouns. Think of Growth Mindset as a verb, an action item.

This is not about going through the motions and telling yourself how great you are, or rewarding yourself for just showing up. Learning, growth and neural plasticity all involve friction, effort and struggle. They are not supposed to be easy. If what you are doing is easy then you probably are not learning and growing, you are simply going through the motions. Going through the motions can make you feel like you are making progress because you are doing something, but it is an illusion. 

What makes a winner? A winner is someone who makes the commitment to effort and process in the pursuit of growth, learning, and improvement while embracing the friction and ensuring proper rest and recovery. A winner is someone who does all that in service to a cause greater than themselves. 

Life is full of winners, most of who will never achieve fame or notoriety, but all of who will make a difference in in the lives of others as a role model and mentor. 

What’s Important Now? Focus on effort and process. Embrace the Friction. Reward the Process. Strive to be a winner. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: The Badass is already in there.

David Goggins is known as one of the most “badass” people on the planet because of the incredible physical feats he as accomplished. If you are unfamiliar Goggins then I highly recommend you read his book Can’t Hurt Me. You can also go to his website at www.davidgoggins.com or just do a Google search and watch or listen to one of the many interviews people have done with him. If you are offended by profanity I recommend you set aside your judgments on it for 60 minutes and watch the interview. 

On Saturday I took a break from reading and watching interviews with my favorite Neurobiology Professor, Andrew Huberman, and watched an interview Ed Mylett did with Goggins. I read Goggins’ book a couple of years ago after listening to an interview he did with Michael Gervais. I have since watch 2 or 3 other interviews with Goggins and am always impressed by his mindset and thought process. 

One of the things he talked about in the interview was the concept that even when he was at a low point in his early 20s working as an exterminator and was a self described “fat ass” at 297 pounds; the badass that he is now was always inside of him. It was there his whole life waiting to be tapped in to, developed and unleashed. Despite his propensity for profanity he is a man of faith and he says God or some higher entity did not just come down one day and endow him with this gift. It was always inside of him waiting to be embraced and developed. 

The same is true for each of us. We all have a “Badass” inside of us waiting to be embraced, developed and unleashed. I am not suggesting you have to go out and attempt Goggins like feats, but you need to tap into that ability to embrace the struggle, continue to strive to improve. Goggins says he doesn’t care about winning; it is the effort and process that he embraces and loves. Effort and process are what you control. You do not control outcomes. Learning and growth are going to involve effort and struggle. Embrace the effort. Embrace the struggle. Seek to unleash your inner Badass. 

That inner Badass can help drive and inspire you to be the best version of yourself that you can be. The best parent, nurse, teacher, law enforcement officer, paramedic, firefighter, leader, pastor, entrepreneur, massage therapist, mental health professional or any of the other roles and careers you choose to pursue. Developing that inner Badass means developing your mind, body and spirit. It means accepting there are times you will struggle, fail and screw up.  That is ok. To be a Badass is to be human and accept those are all part of the human experience. The Badass inside of you will understand that What’s Important Now is to ask, “What did I learn from this? How can I grow from this? What’s next?” Your inner Badass is what gets you out of bed in the morning when it is still dark and cold to workout. It is what drives you to learn more, do more and be more. 

P.S. The courageous young woman I wrote about last week certainly understood and embodies this philosophy and while she may not think of herself as a Badass, I do.

What’s Important Now? You have a Badass inside of you. Accept it, embrace it, nurture it, develop it and unleash it. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: A story about attitude and courage.

In last week’s post I shared a quote from John Maxwell about the importance of taking total responsibility for our attitude. 

In previous posts I have shared the following quote from Victor Frankl:

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms - to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way”

Victor E. Frankl

Last month a friend shared in an email that his 36-year-old daughter, a mother of twin one year olds, had a large tumor on the top of her brain and was facing brain surgery in mid July. This would be her 7th brain surgery since the age of 14. I reached out last week to check in on him and see how his daughter was doing approximately 3 weeks after her surgery. 

Here is his response: “She is doing fantastic. Working hard to get all her motor skills back up to par. This surgery impacted her motor movement area and she was extremely weak on the left side for the first couple weeks after surgery. My wife and I have enjoyed taking care of her twin one year old babies. We are looking at some radiation treatments and will learn more about that later this month. All in all everything went great and she continues to fight like no one I have ever known. She is back to work full time as a medical coder from home, taking care of her babies and planning for the future.”

Wow. In a world where it has become popular to play the blame game and assume a victim mentality, it is powerful to hear a story like this. A story of choosing courage, when it would have been easy to give in to the fear. A story of refusing to play the victim role, when it would have been very easy to do so. A story of a courageous young woman choosing to embrace the last of the human freedoms and choosing to fight for what is important in her life. 

These are the stories we need to celebrate and share to help inspire each of us as we face challenges in our own life. 

What’s Important Now? Embrace the last of the human freedoms and choose well. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Make today that day.

"The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up."

John C. Maxwell

What’s Important Now? Make today the greatest day in your life and encourage those closest to you to do the same. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Be cautious of where we are headed.

The current narrative consuming North America, and perhaps the world, is allegedly about stopping racism and discrimination. I fully support that, however it would appear that certain groups are working to make the narrative regarding racism about only one group. Are Blacks the target of racism? Absolutely, but they are not the only racial or ethnic group who is the target of racism. Are Blacks the subject of discrimination? Absolutely, but they are one of many groups who are discriminated against. 

I am concerned that people who make the statement “all lives matter” are shouted down, attacked in person and online, and called racists. If racism is about the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to dominate others, or that a particular racial group is inferior to the others, and hatred or intolerance of another race or other races, then it seems hypocritical to shout down someone who supports the notion that all lives matter. It would seem to me that embracing the philosophy that all lives matter is a giant first step in the fight against racism. 

If the call is to end racism and discrimination, and we can accept that discrimination is, “Treatment or consideration based on class or category, such as race or gender, rather than individual merit; partiality or prejudice.” then it would seem that the philosophy that all lives matter is a good first step in eliminating discrimination as well. Discrimination is about more than race. Discrimination is also related to gender, weight, sexuality, disability, religious beliefs, profession and other areas. In fact one of the byproducts of the current narrative is that law enforcement officers are being discriminated against, attacked, disparaged and banned from businesses simply because of their chosen profession and their uniform. 

We are seeing politicians in some locations working to take money from police department budgets, which I am opposed to, and promising to use them for programs to support blacks in their communities. Politicians are elected to represent all their constituents, not just one group. Prioritizing one group to the exclusion of others who are also lacking access to affordable housing, health care and quality education seems to be discriminatory, and possibly even racist. It also begs the question “Why now?” Why did they all of a sudden become interested in helping the under privileged people in their communities who they, the politicians, have long neglected?

We are also seeing a large number of professional athletes once again jumping up and screaming about the injustices to a single race. Are they not also concerned about the other groups living in poverty and subjected to racism and discrimination? If those millionaire professional athletes are truly concerned, and a few are, then what are they doing to utilize their personal wealth and influence to make meaningful and lasting impact in the areas of housing, education, health care and job skills training in disadvantaged communities. What are they doing to address the growing issue of young men in those communities growing up in single parent households? What are they doing to address the gang violence and escalating murder rates plaguing so many low-income communities? A few are doing great work in those communities. Too many are doing a lot of screaming and yelling from the comfort of their posh mansions in their gated communities.  

Let me be very clear. I fully support the philosophy that Black lives matter. I do not in any way however, support the organization Black Lives Matter. 

My concern is that we are going to create even more divides and problems in society if we focus solely on one race in the fight against racism and discrimination. 

What’s Important Now? See people, all people, as people. Continue to work to eliminate racism and discrimination against all people. 

P.S. If you think I am a racist for writing this then take a deep breath and go back and reread the full post a few times. If you still think I am a racist after that, then all I can say is I am sorry you feel that way. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

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W.I.N. Wednesday: It’s ok to be picky.

It’s ok to be picky about what you read, what you watch and what you listen to. Your time, attention and energy are all finite resources. Be careful how you use, spend, waste or invest them. 

It does not matter how many people recommend a book, if it is not resonating with you then put it down and read something else. It may not be the right book for you, or the right time for you to read that book. I have books I have put down and then gone back to months later when I was in a different place mentally and I got a lot of value from the book. Others I have put down, never to return to again.

It is ok to reread books as often as you like. You will likely get something new out of the book every time you reread it. 

It is ok (and highly encouraged) to be very selective about where you get your news and what you read or listen to regarding current events. You do not have to read every article someone links to on Facebook or LinkedIn. You do not have to read the newspaper or watch the news every day. If you are going to forward articles to other people make sure you read the full article first. Headlines can be deceiving and people will get frustrated if you send them articles you have not bothered to read yourself. 

It is ok to be selective about what podcasts you listen to. Just because you subscribe to a podcast does not mean you have to listen to every episode. I have a few podcasts where I really like the interview style of the host. I will look at the topic and the guest and determine if I am willing invest the time to listen to that episode. There are some podcasters who have some great guests on, but their style of interviewing guests drives me crazy so rather than get frustrated I will find other options for listening to that guest. It is ok to fast-forward through the first 5 to 8 minutes of many podcasts where they are talking about their sponsors and advocating you go to iTunes and leave a review to boost ratings. It is also ok to listen to the information about the various sponsors as there may be some that resonate with you and of course it is ok to go to iTunes and leave a review if you got great value from that episode. 

You do not have to read every W.I.N. Wednesday post. Some of the topics I write about may not be of interest to you and I get that. 

What’s Important Now? It is ok to be picky about how you invest your time, energy and attention.

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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W.I.N. Wednesday: It's a human condition.

There is a lot of talk today about implicit bias and law enforcement. Implicit bias is not a cop thing. It is not a white thing. It is a not a black thing. It is a human thing. There is also a lot of confusion as some people are using the terms racism and implicit bias interchangeably. Racism, as explained it to me by a psychologist, is not an implicit bias; it is an explicit bias.

Implicit Bias, a term first coined by social psychologists Mahzarin and Tony Greenwald in 1995, is a human condition. According to a Psychology Today article “Implicit bias is a normal behavioral phenomenon; it happens to everyone all the time.” When I interviewed Reverend Dr. Bryant T. Marks on the topic of Implicit Bias for the Excellence in Training Academy he told me, “If you are a human being living in society and have a brain, then you have implicit bias.” Implicit bias is also known as Implicit Social Cognition. Social Cognition is how we process information about other human beings. 

According to the research implicit bias is, “an unconscious association, belief, or attitude towards any social group. As a result of these implicit biases, people may often attribute certain qualities or characteristics to all members of a particular group, a phenomenon known as stereotyping.” Biases and stereotypes are not in and of themselves good or bad, positive or negative. 

Stanford Professor Jennifer Eberhardt says, “Implicit biases are the product of learned associations and social conditioning.” These implicit biases are influenced by experiences, although they may not be the result of direct personal experiences. Cultural conditioning, media portrayals and upbringing can all contribute to the implicit associations people form about members of social groups. According to Dr. Marks, “Implicit bias is not a character issue, it is an exposure issue.” 

In her book Biased Dr. Eberhart writes, “We all have ideas about race, even the most open-minded among us. Those ideas have the power to bias our perception, our attention, our memory, and our actions – all despite our conscious awareness or deliberate intentions. Our ideas about race are shaped by the stereotypes to which we are exposed to on a daily basis. And one of the strongest stereotypes in American society associates blacks with criminality.” Dr. Eberhardt also reminds us, “It is possible to unconsciously associate positive or negative traits with one’s own race, gender or background.” 

According to The Ohio State University Kirwan Institute for the Study of Race and Ethnicity, “The implicit associations we harbor in our subconscious cause us to have feelings and attitudes about other people based on characteristics such as race, ethnicity, age and appearance. These associations develop over the course of a lifetime beginning at a very early age through exposure to direct and indirect messages. In addition to early life experiences, the media and news programming are often-cited origins of implicit associations.”

The Ohio State University Kirwan Institute for the Study of Race and Ethnicity also states, “Implicit biases are pervasive. Everyone possesses them, even people with avowed commitments to impartiality such as judges. “ They go on to point out, “The implicit associations we hold do not necessarily align with our declared beliefs or even reflect stances we would explicitly endorse.” 

You can see how problems can arise when someone from one social group (such as the police) interact with someone from another social group (such as a young black male) if both parties hold negative implicit biases and subconscious associations about the other. 

Because implicit biases are subconscious associations you are not going to change negative implicit biases simply by attending a 2 or 4 hour workshop, or reading a book about bias. Those are great places to start, as the first step towards meaningful change is awareness. Changing negative subconscious associations however, takes time, attention and intention. Dr. Marks says, “These changes require empathy, not guilt and they require a willingness to learn and listen.” He recommends you seek a balance of exposure, and look for examples of people from a social group who do not fit the stereotype you may hold. 

Other strategies include:

• Striving to see people as individuals. Friend and mentor Chip Huth advocates that, “We see people as people. People who have their own hopes, dreams, fears, aspirations, experiences, influences and biases.”

• Make a conscious effort to be aware of, and change your negative stereotypes of people. 

• Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Seeing another person as an individual and seeking to understand their perspective is part of being empathic. 

• Engage in conversations not debates. 

• Have compassion for yourself and others. We are all human, all have biases and we all make mistakes. 

What’s Important Now? Accept that implicit bias is part of the human condition. To change negative implicit biases requires us all to stop pointing outward, and continually look inward. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Be One

 “Waste no more time talking about what a good man is like. Be one.”

Marcus Aurelius

There always seems to be a lot of talk about what a good man, a good woman, a good leader, a good teammate, a good parent, a good neighbor, a good teacher, or a good friend should be. That talk, like so much in today’s society, is other focused. 

The problem with being other focused from an improvement standpoint is that it keeps us from looking inward and practicing the two disciplines Coach Raveling talked about, “Self Leadership and Self Discipline.”

“Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound.”

James Allen

 It is only when we are willing to change ourselves that we can get unstuck and move forward. This requires that we stop talking about what a “good __________” is, and strive to Be One. 

Doing so requires curiosity, humility, vulnerability, courage and a growth mindset. It also requires the acceptance that this is a journey and not a destination. The moment you believe you have arrived you will stop doing the work and your slide towards mediocrity will begin. 

The circumstances will likely not change. What will change is how you perceive those circumstances, whether they serve as an obstacle or an opportunity for growth. What will change are the stories you tell yourself about those circumstances and whether you see yourself as the victim or the victor in those stories. 

This will likely require that you spend less time on social media, and more time doing the work. This means less time commenting on other people’s posts and more time reading, learning, applying what you are learning, getting feedback, assessing the feedback, refining your efforts and continually repeating that process. 

P.S. Be sure to make time for physical activity, healthy eating, meditation, sleep and maybe even some good red wine. 

What’s Important Now? Continually strive to “Be One”.

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Make the Shift

In many of my seminars and courses over the last 15 years I have talked about the importance of making the shift from Problem Identifier to Problem Solver. It is easy to be a Problem Identifier; to sit around over coffee, lunch, or a beer, or on Skype, Zoom or one of the many social media platforms and talk about what’s wrong. What’s wrong with all levels of government, what’s wrong with the health care system, what’s wrong with the educational system, what’s wrong with your organization, what’s wrong with your boss, what’s wrong with your co-workers, and the list goes on. 

While it may feel good to vent, little, if any, good comes from these complaining sessions. The negativity unfortunately is infectious and a number of other people usually jump on the “What’s Wrong with ___________________” bandwagon. As a result of these sessions people usually walk away with a sense of depleted energy, frustration, agitation, victimization and sometimes helplessness or even hopelessness. If you could measure the loss of productivity resulting from these sessions, the impact would be staggering.

The shift to being Problem Solvers redirects the conversation from problems to solutions. It encourages everyone to ask, “What piece of this do I own?” and “What can I, and we, do to make a positive impact on the problem?” Instead of sucking the energy out of you, this mindset usually energizes people as possible solutions and action steps are discussed. The key is to have open conversations where ideas can be put forward and discussed, refined, enhanced and assessed. 

In the Dare to Be Great leadership workshop we explore Two Guiding Questions and Three Rules. Rule #2 is - No whining. No complaining. No Excuses. This is a rule about making that shift. The power of Rule #2 is that it forces us to shift from being a Problem Identifier to becoming a Problem Solver. 

If you are continually pointing the finger of blame at others and unwilling to accept your role in the current situation, you are violating Rule #2. If you are demanding others change, but are unwilling to first change yourself, you are violating Rule # 2. If you are screaming that things need to change, but not putting forth any practical, sustainable solutions for change, you are violating Rule #2. If you complain about “how things are”, but are not willing to take an active role in creating positive, lasting change, you are violating Rule #2. 

It is easy to be “The Critic” or “The Opposition” and complain about what is wrong with the system, the organization, your boss and your peers without proposing viable solutions or being willing to take an active role in implementing change. 

“We but mirror the world. All the tendencies present in the outer world are to be found in the world of our body. If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. This is the divine mystery supreme. A wonderful thing it is and the source of our happiness. We need not wait to see what others do.” 

Mahatma Gandhi

What’s Important Now? Make the Shift. Be a Problem Solver. Be the change you want to see in your world. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Seneca's List

I am a fan of Ryan Holiday’s books and his Daily Stoic newsletter. One of the things he posted in the last few weeks included the below list of things Seneca tried to do daily.  

Things Seneca tried to do daily:

·      Wake up early

·      Stick to his routine

·      Treat everyone he met as an opportunity for kindness

·      Look for one nugget of wisdom

·      Prepare for adversity

·      Write to a friend

·      Meditate on his mortality

·      Put his day up for review

This list provides a good framework for all of us. I know there is some controversy around the “wake up early” concept and everyone has different ideas of what “early” means. I would suggest you could modify that to “Go to bed and wake up at a consistent time every day”. The research shows that being consistent with the time you go to bed and the time you wake up is one helpful aspect to getting quality sleep.

I realize that many of you are still dealing with the challenges of working from home and working out at home, while looking after your kids who are at home. Hopefully you have been able to develop some routines around healthy eating, working, working out, family time, time for reading and other elements of self care and self growth. Those routines and rituals are important.

Preparing for adversity is not about being paranoid; it is about being prepared mentally and physically. Are you prepared in the event of adversity such as the need to self isolate or quarantine your family for two weeks as a result of one of you testing positive for COVID-19, or being a close contact of someone who tested positive. We are also still seeing the impact of COVID-19 on businesses and jobs, and will for some time.  

Writing to a friend may mean reaching out through e-mail or a phone call to someone to check in and see how he or she is doing. If you get the sense they are struggling then find what you can do to be of service to them. Sometimes just knowing that someone is thinking of them may be enough to lift their spirits. 

My understanding of the concept of meditating on our mortality is accepting that for all of us our time on earth is limited. Once we accept that it can help guide our thoughts and actions to ensure we use our time well in order to learn, grow, share and be of greatest service to others.  

Putting our day up for review is not just about seeing if you ticked off all the boxes on your “To Do” list; it is a chance to reflect on how you did regarding your “To Be” list.  To be a better son / daughter, sister / brother, husband / wife / partner, mother / father, leader, learner, coach, mentor, role model and any other roles you fill each day. 

What’s Important Now? What can you take from Seneca’s list to enhance your life? 

 Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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W.I.N. Wednesday: More insights from the Coach

Last week I share some insights from the June 2020 interview Tim Ferriss conducted with Coach George Raveling. This week I wanted to share a few final insights from notes I wrote while listening to the 2018 and 2020 interviews Tim Ferriss did with Coach Raveling.

On personal responsibility:

“Practice: Self Leadership and Self Discipline” – This message is taped to the mirror in the main bathroom in Coach Raveling’s home so he sees it every morning. It reminds him, and is an important message to all of us, to practice the two important concepts every day. Leadership Guru John Maxwell says, “The hardest person I will ever lead is myself.” Self Leadership and Self Discipline take focus, commitment and daily effort.  

“Look within, before you look out.” - Our natural tendency is to look outside for people and circumstances to blame for any part of our life where we are unsatisfied or unsuccessful. The literature on growth however, suggests that it is not what happens to us that is most important, but the stories we tell ourselves about what happened. The narrative we create around those events will determine whether we become victors or victims. This is consistent with Victor Frankl’s quote “The last of the human freedoms: to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.”

“If you want to do something that will change the world, you change first.” - First of all changing the world is too big a task; focus on your part of the world. In your part of the world the only person you have control over is you, so if you want things to change, start with yourself. This is simple, but not easy. 

“If it is to be, it is up to me.” Coach Raveling has had this quote posted on his office door and other prominent places for decades. 

On learning and staying curious:

“What is it that I don’t know that I need to know and how is this going to help me stay relevant?” This is a question Coach Raveling continually asks himself. In addition to the blogs and newspapers he reads Coach Raveling has a personal library of thousands of books. He has a very unique style of reading and marking up books, which he talks about in the 2018 interview. At 80 he was still making a daily trip to the book store to seek out and buy books that could help him to learn, grow and stay relevant. This intense curiosity and desire to learn and grow is an important challenge to all of us. In an interview I listened to recently with Neil deGrasse Tyson, he too talked about the importance of curiosity. 

“Information equals Knowledge. Knowledge equals Wisdom. Wisdom equals Growth. And Growth allows me to share.” This is a personal formula Coach Raveling developed over his lifetime. The constant learning and growth allows him to share with others. This is why I believe that knowledge is not power; it is potential. The potential to empower others if we are willing to seek it, distil it, refine it, make connections and share it with others. 

What’s Important Now? Practice Self Leadership and Self Discipline, stay curious and share your knowledge and wisdom. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com

www.winningmindtraining.com

Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

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