W.I.N. Wednesday: Over and over again, just do the work.

"There is no formula for success—you just begin and then you continue. I’m often asked how to have a career in stand-up and the answer is confoundingly simple: Do the work. Over and over again, just do the work. After you build the courage to get onstage that first time, it’s all about repetition."

Cameron Esposito, Stand-up Comedian 

There is no secret. There are no shortcuts or hacks that lead to long-term impact and a life of significance. You must show up, do the work, learn, iterate, and repeat. It is not sexy. It is not 5 easy steps to be a millionaire in a week. It is not, “Do what you love, and you will never work another day in your life.” 

There will be struggle and friction. Embrace the Struggle. It is a critical part of growth and learning.

Some days and some tasks are going to suck. Embrace the Suck. Focus on what you control and control the controllable.

Look for the Learning in the struggle, the friction, the mistakes, the successes, and the failures.

Look for the Good in the challenges, obstacles, experiences, and the people.

Dare to Be Great understanding that greatness is a journey, not an end state. 

Look behind the curtain. Look backstage with the people who lead lives of significance and impact. The show up every day and do the work, over and over again. They likely don’t post about it on social media because they are busy doing the work instead of talking about what they did. 

Is this simple? Yes. Is it easy? No. 

What’s Important Now? Begin and then continue. Do the work. Over and over again, just do the work.

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Focus on becoming, not being.

“Becoming is better than being.”

Carol Dweck

Focusing on becoming means you are committed to the effort, the process, the journey. Becoming is about developing a Growth Mindset and believing you can learn, grow, and improve if you put in the work. 

Becoming is about becoming a little better tomorrow that you are today and repeating that process every day. It is about small incremental improvements compounded over time. 

Becoming is about embracing the struggle, embracing the suck, looking for the learning and looking for the good. 

Becoming is ok with you showing up every day and doing the work and not posting about it on social media.

“No matter how much you have achieved, you will always be merely good relative to what you can become. Greatness is an inherently dynamic process, not an end point. The moment you think of yourself as great, your slide toward mediocrity will have already begun.”

Jim Collins, Good to Great and the Social Sectors

The moment you think you have arrived is the moment you shift from becoming to being. That is the moment you stop doing the work that got you there, which is why your slide to mediocrity begins at that moment. 

What’s Important Now? Embrace the journey of becoming. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Take control of this seldom considered, but powerful influence in your life.

“I am seldom considered, though I do more to influence everything about you than virtually any one thing in your life.  I often control the time you get up in the morning, the time you go to sleep, what you eat and drink and the very thought that runs through your head.  I can make you either happy or sad, loving, or hateful, cheerful, or remorseful, congenial, or spiteful and in doing so, control the very capacity that you have for success.

“No, you don't often think of me; instead, you blame the problem I create on the shortcoming of others, or the state of the economy, or your family or a million other reasons.

“When my impact on your life is fully considered in your every thought and action, when you are mindful of my awesome power, when you nurture and groom me for positive use in your life, I can become more contagious than the most prolific disease ever witnessed by man.  My influence will spread to every person you come in contact with.

“Groomed and nurtured in a positive manner there will be no person or obstacle that can stand in the way of my success or fail to be impacted for the better.

“I am your attitude.”

Author Unknown

Your attitude is one of the few things in life that you do control. 

Focus on what you control. Control the controllable.

What’s Important Now? Attitude is a choice. Choose well. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Please don’t take it out on them.

If you don’t like wearing a mask in airports and on planes, don’t get mad at the gate agents, flight attendants and pilots.  They don’t make the rules. They are however asked to enforce them, and they don’t get paid any extra because of those rules. 

If you must wear a mask to go into a restaurant or show proof of vaccination to enjoy sit down dining at a restaurant don’t get mad at the restaurant staff or owners. They don’t make the rules. They are however asked to enforce them, and they don’t get paid any extra because of those rules and in some jurisdictions if they don’t not follow the rules they get shut down. 

If you don’t like the COVID rules and restrictions where you live, then don’t get mad at the health care workers, public health department officials or public safety personnel who are asked to ensure people are following the rules. They don’t make the rules. They are however asked to enforce them, and they don’t get paid any extra because of those rules.

If you are upset because your flight is late or delayed don’t take it out on the gate agent or flight attendant. They did not break the plane or cause the weather system that is creating the delay. They are not happy about it either as it makes their job more difficult. They are simply ones who must deliver the bad news to you. They don’t get paid any extra to deliver that bad news. 

It is easy to take out your displeasure, anger, or frustration on whoever is right in front of you, even if they had no role in creating the situation. If you are mad at the politicians because you do not like the law or rules, they have put in place then find a lawful and professional way to voice your concerns to them. If you are mad about the weather causing travel delays; get over it. If you are mad at yourself for not leaving enough time between flights to account for even slight delays, instead of taking it out on a gate agent, remember that next time you book flights. 

Often the people who get paid the least in an organization are the ones who must deliver the bad news and enforce the rules. They become the face of the problem they did not create. Please don’t take your anger and frustration out on them. 

If you don’t like the rules or the situation you find yourself in, then what are you doing to change it? Taking your anger out on the person in front of you who is doing their job and trying to make the best of the situation is not productive and reflects badly on you, not on them. 

What’s Important Now? Breathe. Slow down. Focus on what you control. Control the controllable. Please don’t take it out on them.

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: What do you need to let go of?

"I think of the trees and how simply they let go, let fall the riches of a season, how without grief (it seems) they can let go and go deep into their roots for renewal and sleep...

Imitate the trees. Learn to lose in order to recover, and remember that nothing stays the same for long, not even pain, psychic pain. Sit it out. Let it all pass. Let it go."

May Sarton

What is weighing you down and holding you back that you need to let go of to be able to move forward? 

“Hanging on to resentment is letting someone you despise live rent free in your head.”

Esther Lederer, a.k.a. Anne Landers 

Who is living rent free in your head?

What’s Important Now? Learn to let go. Simple, not easy, but worth it. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: You have to figure life out for yourself.

The following is an excerpt from the book The Power of Awareness: And Other Secrets from the World's Foremost Spies, Detectives, and Special Operators on How to Stay Safe and Save Your Life by Dan Schilling and it holds an important message for all of us.

“The one thing I’ve taken away that was central to Siddhartha Gautama’s (the man who came to be known as the Buddha) teachings was, “Don’t take anyone’s word for it. You have to figure life out for yourself.””

It is important that we continually read broadly and deeply, listen actively, and learn from others. It is important that we spend time in reflection to learn from our own thoughts and experiences. It is important to have mentors, coaches and guides in your life who can help you navigate the complexities and chaos in today’s world. You get to decide however, what to read, who to listen to, what you take away from your experiences and the experiences of others. 

Having said all that, it is important to understand that you have to figure life out for yourself. No two humans are exactly alike. No two lives are the same. No one else can tell you how to live your life, although many people will try to do just that. The best any of us can do is share principles, concepts, knowledge, insights, and our experiences. The key then is for you to take that information, put it through your filter and then figure out if, and how to apply it to your life, if that is appropriate. 

“Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.”

Bruce Lee

There is no “one way” of eating, working out, meditating, or living. We all need to figure out what works for us, given our lives, and the resources we have. The power of What’s Important Now? is the diverse ways it can be applied to help each of us navigate our own life. 

What’s Important Now? You have to figure life out for yourself. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: The ones who move the world along.

"I long to accomplish a great and noble task; but it is my chief duty and joy to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. ... The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker."

Helen Keller

The mainstream media and social media seem to always focus on what they perceive to be the accomplishment of “great and noble tasks”. They focus on the athlete or team who wins a Gold Medal or national championship. Billionaires and celebrities going into space. Actors winning an Oscar. The Nobel Prize winners. The entrepreneur who sells his or her start-up for hundreds of millions of dollars. Heroic feats of members of the military Special Operations community. 

What they rarely, if ever, focus on are the tiny, daily pushes of what Helen Keller refers to as the “honest workers” in society. These are the people who show up every day, do great work, provide a valuable service, and accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble, often for modest or little pay and no accolades. These are the people who make the world “move along” every day. They are the foundation of every organization and of society. They make up the greatest percentage of the people in every business. They do the jobs that some refer to as menial. They are often referred to as “just a …..”. 

Many of us fall into this category. I know I do and have for the last 50 years. 

Be proud of the tiny pushes you make every day. Be proud of the work you do. Be proud of the contributions you make. Be proud of the reality that you play a part in moving the world along. 

What’s Important Now? Be proud, keep making the tiny pushes and strive to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Something has to change.

If you hate your job, you have three basic choices:

1.    Change your attitude.

2.    Change jobs.

3.    Choose to be miserable. 

The problem with Option #3 is that when you choose to be miserable, and it is a choice, you are also choosing to make everyone else around you miserable. You are impacting your family, your co-workers, your customers, and everyone else you interact with. 

The problem with Option #2 is that it is likely your boss you dislike, not necessarily your job. The research shows that many people leave jobs to get away from bad bosses. The research also shows that there are a large percentage of people in the workforce who go to jobs every day that they hate. They are likely going to work for bad bosses every day. If you are quitting your job because you hate your boss, what are the chances then that you will land a job where you get to work for a great leader? If you do land a job working for great leader what are the chances, they will be there long term or that if you choose to seek promotion that once you get promoted you will get to work for a great leader in that position? It would seem there is a shortage of great leaders at all levels, in many organizations. You could start your own business. Just be careful you do not end up with a bad boss there as well. 

That takes us to Option #1 – Change Your Attitude. Simple. Not easy. This starts with focusing on what you control and controlling the controllable. You do not control your boss. You do control your attitude. Take time to reflect on your job and find meaning and purpose in the work. It does not matter what you do for a living, you can find value and purpose in that work if you choose to. You are serving someone. You are allowing other people to do their job. 

The most important people in a hospital to reduce the spread of infection are likely the cleaning staff. The housekeeping staff at a hotel are critical to the experience people have with that hotel, especially in a world with digital keys where you may have limited interaction with people at the hotel. The people working in a factory that makes the material from which body armor is made are saving the lives of law enforcement and military personnel. The ticket agent at the airport is often the first point of contact for a trip and their attitude in dealing with you can impact your entire trip. 

Choose to take pride in what you do and find value and purpose in what you do. If your boss is an ass, that sucks. Embrace the Suck and choose not to allow them to negatively impact your entire life. Simple. Not easy. 

Accept that you are in a position to lead. Leadership is never about rank, position and title. Those things put you in a formal leadership position, they do not make you a leader. Author and leadership guru John Maxwell says that leadership is Influence. Accept that you are in a position of influence in your organization. 

Follow the Leadership 101 advice below.

Leadership 101

·      Do Your Job

·      Treat People Right

·      Give All Out Effort

·      Have An All In Attitude

If there is a lack of leadership in your organization then consider seeking promotion and change that by becoming the leader you always wanted. 

I am not a fan of the advice, “Find a job you love, and you will never have to work another day in your life.” Too many people spend their entire careers being miserable seeking that illusive “job they love”. Consider changing your attitude and learning to love what you do. You may find that you enjoy what you do, who you do it with and who you do it for. You will also likely put more effort into the work you do, seek opportunities to learn and grow and you may just find that new opportunities open up for you. 

Changing your attitude will also positively impact your health and your relationships. 

What’s Important Now? Life is full of choices. Choose well. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

W.I.N. Wednesday: You can't be both of these at the same time.

“You can’t be envious and happy at the same time. People who pay too much attention to social comparisons find themselves chronically vulnerable, threatened, and insecure.”

“The happier the person, the less attention she pays to how others around her are doing.”

Sonja Lyubomirsky

I was talking to someone recently who I personally respect a great deal, and who is highly respected and accomplished in their field. Based on interactions with others in a group they have recently become a member of, they made the comment, “I am an underachiever.” They are far from an underachiever, but that is a comment I hear a lot and at times have found myself muttering to myself. 

It is too easy to get sucked into the comparison game. We compare our titles, status at work and the number of promotions we have received. We compare formal education, paycheques and social media followers. We compare vacation photos, homes and vehicles. We compare the success of our children. Speakers compare the number of speaking gigs every year, the size of the audiences, testimonials and evaluations. You compare yourself to someone who has done a TEDx talk and people who have done TEDx talks compare themselves to people who have done a TED talk and they all compare views. 

We generally compare things that are surface level. We rarely compare impact as can be hard to measure. Titles, status, numbers of followers, number of views and number of attendees are not reflective of impact. The size of your house or the amount of money you make is not reflective of impact. The size of the audience or the number of “followers” someone has is not reflective of impact. 

We also tend to put too much emphasis on “success” and not enough on “significance”. Success is measured by some arbitrary standard usually based around job title, how much money you make, the size of your house and the type of car you drive. None of those are measures of significance. 

There are many people who live lives of significance and impact who may never be considered “successful “and are certainly not famous. Many of them may find themselves feeling “less than” and thinking they are an “underachiever” when nothing could be further from the truth. 

“You can’t be envious and happy at the same time. People who pay too much attention to social comparisons find themselves chronically vulnerable, threatened, and insecure.”

“The happier the person, the less attention she pays to how others around her are doing.”

Sonja Lyubomirsky

What’s Important Now? Step away from the comparison game and strive to live a life of significance and impact. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: You can pay now, or you can potentially pay a huge price later.

Attention is a limited commodity. 

As humans we will pay attention to what is important to us in the moment. 

Sometimes “what is important” will be determined by the immediate presence of danger or a potential threat. When that happens there will be things in the environment that you are not attending to and become fundamentally blind to. 

Other times you get to choose what you pay attention to. Here too, you will be "blind' to what you are not attending to. 

During the safety briefing on an airplane you can choose to pay attention to the safety briefing or you can pay attention to your phone, your book, the person beside you or something else that will not contribute to your safety and performance during an emergency.

When you are driving you can pay attention to the roadway, to traffic, to the presence of pedestrians and to the potential for danger, or you can pay attention to your phone and possible pay with your life, or cost someone else their life. 

When you are walking down a sidewalk, or through a mall, airport or other public place you can pay attention to where you are going and what is happening around you, or you can pay attention to your phone and be completely unaware of other people and / or potential hazards in your environment.  

When you are in a conversation with another person you can pay attention to them, what they are saying and not saying, their facial expressions and body language, their feelings and emotions or you can pay attention to distractions such as your phone or Apple watch beeping or buzzing, that e-mail on your computer or the television. Understand the impact on the other person, the relationship and the consequences of choosing the distractions over the person.

What’s Important Now? Attention is a limited commodity. Be aware of what you are paying attention to. Train your attention. Invest your attention wisely. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: You can win, or you can learn. Or…..

You have likely heard the phrase, “You can win, or you can learn.” Many times, we also talk about the fact that we will learn more from our failures than our successes. The premise is that when you fail to win you have an opportunity to learn from the experience. I agree with the mindset that when you fail to win, or fail to achieve your goal, you should take the opportunity to conduct an after-action review or debriefing so you can ensure you learn from the experience. 

Lately, however, I have been thinking about this philosophy and have come to realize that there is a gap, a missed learning opportunity. What if you also learned from your wins and successes? What if you did after action reviews or debriefings when you were successful to determine what you learned and what you could do better next time? Those debriefings may reveal that you won because you were lucky, or that you won despite some less desirable decisions that were made along the way. Remember that sometimes poor decisions result in good outcomes and sometimes good decisions result in poor outcomes. 

In order to have an organizational culture of learning you need to make learning an everyday thing, not just a sometimes thing focused only on when you lose or fail. With the right culture you can learn from your wins and successes as well as from your failures and losses. 

What’s Important Now? Win or lose, always be learning. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

www.daretobegreatleadership.com The online Dare to Be Great: Strategies for Creating a Culture of Leading workshop was created to help aspiring leaders and frontline leaders on their leadership journey. Subscribe to the weekly blog while you are there. 

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Let’s show some love to the Home Team as well.

Thursday of last week was Remembrance Day in Canada and Veterans Day in the US. A day where we pause to remember those who made the ultimate sacrifice as members of our military and to thank all those who have served, and those who continue to serve in the military for their service and their sacrifice. It is appropriate that we take the time to remember and honor those who serve and those we have lost.  

I spend a fair amount of time in airports and it is common for people to approach and thank current and former members of the military for their service. That appreciation is well deserved. Many members of our militaries have spent months and years away from their home and their families on deployments to wars zones and areas of conflict around the world and we need to thank them, and their families, for those sacrifices. It is also common to acknowledge, thank and honor the members of our militaries, past and present, for their contributions and sacrifices for our freedoms: Our freedom of speech and freedom of religion and our ability to live in a free and democratic society. Those are all appropriate. The military is the “Away Team” as they are very rarely deployed within our own borders in North America.

Once those freedoms have been earned through the sacrifices of the men and women of the military, the Away Team, we need men and women who are willing to step into professions of service within our own borders and our communities and ensure we can continue to enjoy those freedoms. That is the role of the men and women of law enforcement. They are the “Home Team”. It is common for members of the military to thank law enforcement for watching over their families and keeping them safe while they are deployed in foreign lands. 

Both professions are made up of men and women who are ordinary human beings, who often perform seemingly superhuman tasks in very challenging situations. People in both professions have a heart of service. People in both professions suffer from the trauma they are exposed to. Mental health and suicide are major concerns in both professions. People in both professions make mistakes, and sometimes those mistakes cost human life. 

If our freedoms depend on both the Away Team and the Home Team why do we then so easily turn on the Home Team?  Is it because the actions of the Away Team do not directly impact you, your family, your friends and your community? Is it because we see news coverage of the battles won in defeating an evil foreign enemy by the Away Team and generally only see news coverage when the Home Team has a seemingly “bad outcome”? We celebrate when we see pictures and videos of members of the Away Team meeting with village elders or community members in some foreign village and playing with children in those conflict riddled countries, yet ignore these daily occurrence between members of the Home Team and the communities they serve. 

We need both the Home Team and the Away Team. We need to keep showing our appreciation for the sacrifice and service of the Away Team and we need to show more love and appreciation for the Home Team, and their families, for the sacrifices they make throughout their careers. If you are a member of the ‘Silent Majority’ who do support, trust and appreciate the men and women of law enforcement please break the silence. When you see law enforcement officers be sure to express your appreciation. It is as simple as walking up and saying, “I appreciate what you do. Thank you for your service. Have a great rest of your shift.” 

What’s Important Now? This is a rough time for the Home Team. Lets show them some love, respect and appreciation. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. Maximizing human potential through Life's Most Powerful Question - What's Important Now?

www.daretobegreatleadership.com The online Dare to Be Great: Strategies for Creating a Culture of Leading workshop was created to help aspiring leaders and frontline leaders on their leadership journey. Subscribe to the weekly blog while you are there. 

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W.I.N. Wednesday: What if.....?

“You get ideas when you ask yourself simple questions. The most important of the questions is just, ‘What if...?’”

Neil Gaiman

Too often people’s immediate response to a new idea or suggestion on how something could be improved is to list all the reasons it won’t work. 

What if we asked “What if?” more often?

What if it could work? What would that look like and feel like?

What if we could do it? What would be the benefits to the team and organization? 

What if we could do it? Where would we start? 

What if we could get this approved? What would we need to do to make it happen?

What if I could learn this new skill? Where in my life would I experience the benefits? 

What if I could get that promotion or specialty assignment? What skills would be helpful for me to learn to be most successful in that position? 

What if I could get better? How would that positively impact my life? 

What if you had ownership for this problem? How would you fix it?

What if you focused more on what’s right than what is wrong? How would that change your outlook on your work and on the world? 

What if you decided to punch mediocrity in the mouth and embrace the pursuit of excellence? How would your life improve?

What if you decided to embrace the struggle and the suck? How could that new attitude help you to grow?

What if you decided to look for the learning and look for the good in the challenges and in the suck? How would that help you to grow in every area of your life? 

What’s Important Now? What if you asked “What if?” more often?

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: I have been doing this a long time so you are in good hands.

I recently had a dental appointment for a regular teeth cleaning. I went in on a weekend instead of my usual weekday appointments and the hygienist I had that day was someone I had never met before. She introduced herself and said, “I have been doing this a long time so you are in good hands.” I knew she would be very good at what she did, not because of the comment, but because of the people who own the clinic. Ken and Elma hire talent, not bodies, invest in their talent, and run a high quality, highly professional operation, which they are intimately involved in. 

The comment however, got me to thinking. Just because someone has been doing something a long time does that mean they can automatically be trusted to do high quality work?

For some people those years have been committed to the pursuit of excellence and they are on the path to mastery. They continually invest in developing their mind, body and craft. They strive for excellence in everything they do and are continually learning and growing. You are in “good hands” when you work with them. 

For others, they have been putting in time for some, or all of those years. They may have been keen in the early years but as a result of poor culture and a lack of leadership they may have been beat up, and beat down and are now just going through the motions. The number years they have been in the job are not a reflection of their skill level. When you work with them you may, or may not be in “good hands”. 

In some cases new people have the most up to date training and skills and may perform at a higher level than people who have “been doing this a long time”. They are still keen to do a great job and have not been caught up in the efficiency, thoroughness trade off and started taking shortcuts.

What about you? Where are you at in your journey? If you read the W.I.N. Wednesday posts on a regular basis I am going to assume you are committed to the pursuit of excellence and are striving for mastery in some area(s) of your life. The reality however, is that the pursuit of excellence is not a linear progression. We all go through ups and downs. We all fall into slumps at times and may temporarily lose our drive to excel and give in to the biological urge to settle for the most comfortable option. That is part of the human experience. When that happens have some self-compassion, focus on what you control, control the controllable and get back on track. 

What’s Important Now? At some point we will all be in a position to say “I have been doing this a long time.” Make sure you have spent that time well so people are in good hands. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: A reframe on the failure thing.

I have written before about my concerns with how we too often glorify ‘Failure” when in fact without the right culture, mindset and leadership failure may simply lead to more failure, a diminished sense of confidence and never actually result in positive learning. 

Dan Dworkis is someone I have huge respect for. He is author of the great book The Emergency Mindand host of the Emergency Mind Podcast. In a recent newsletter he recommended a video put out by Farnam Street titled Why It’s Important For You To Practice Failure. While I do not claim to be anywhere near as smart as Dan, or the people at Farnam Street, I have a concern with the message from the video and am going to suggest a reframe. 

The following is the e-mail I sent to Dan Dworkis (although I doubt he will get a chance to read it):

Dan,

 I am a fan of your book and podcast and subscribe to your newsletter. I watched the video you recommended from Farnam Street on practicing failure. I would suggest that “practicing failure” is not what we should be doing. We should be striving (to improve, learn and grow) understanding that in the striving sometimes we will fail. When we do fail it is an opportunity to learn, grow and find a better way to do things. Instead of practicing failure I believe we should be practicing to recover from failure. Recover from failure of equipment and systems or failure caused by human error. Recover from failure to accomplish our goals and objectives. In the video I believe the key to his message is that we need to practice recovering from stalls (failure and mistakes), not to practice stalls. The stall may be the result of human error, equipment failure, weather or other factors. I would suggest we need to reframe the discussion on failure to focus on striving, not failing, and practice recovering from failure instead of practicing failing. 

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts. Keep up the important work you are doing on all fronts. 

We do not need to practice making mistakes and practice failing, we do however need to practice recovering from mistakes and failure.  As a pilot if I only practiced making mistakes that resulted in the aircraft stalling, I would only get one opportunity to do that before I crashed. If instead, I simulate conditions that could cause a stall and practice recovering from those stalls then when it happens unexpectedly during a flight I am prepared to deal with it, and recover from it.

Without the right mindset, and the right culture there may be little or no positive learning that results from failure. Practicing mistakes and failure can actually be counterproductive. We do need to prepare for failure and prepare to recover from mistakes and failure. In an interview with Jonathan Fader PhD on the Chasing Excellence podcast Fader (as he likes to be called) addressed his concern with the emphasis on failure. He reframed it as, “We need to have a method to reset after unwanted results.” Fader works with professional athletes and teams in the NFL and MLB and also works with the FDNY. We will all experience unwanted results in life. What many of us fail to do is develop a method to deal with that when it happens, and develop tools to allow us to reset and move forward having learned from the experience. 

A golfer doesn’t need to practice making bad shots. They do need to practice making a recovery shot out of the rough or the sand. A pitcher in baseball does not need to practice throwing balls or pitches that result in a home run. They do need to have a method to recover from those unwanted results. A quarterback in football does not need to practice throwing interceptions. They do need to have a method to recover from those unwanted results. A kicker in football does not need to practice missing a critical field goal. They do need to have a method to recover from those unwanted results. A goaltender does not need to practice giving up a goal at a critical moment in a game. They do need to have a method to recover from those unwanted results. I could go on, but I am sure you get the point. 

As a leader you need to create a culture where you and the people you have the privilege to lead are striving for excellence and are willing to stand up, own up and admit to mistakes and failure in order for the individual, and the team, to learn from those events, make appropriate adjustments and then move forward better off for the experience. If you are a trainer then training should be a safe place for people to fail, recover from it, learn from it and move forward. 

What’s Important Now? Focus on striving. Focus on the pursuit of excellence. Develop skills for recovering from failure, human error, and unwanted results. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Be cautious judging the quality of the decisions by the outcome.

In today’s polarized world I see a lot of people judging the quality of decisions people made simply by the outcome. We all need to be cautious about judging the quality of the decisions by the outcome. Sometimes good decisions lead to bad outcomes and sometimes, bad decisions result in good outcomes. There are a lot of factors that influence outcomes, which are outside the control of the decision maker. 

Looking at decisions through the lens of Hindsight Bias is easy. You know the outcome so if it is a positive outcome you assume the decisions were good and move on. If the outcome is bad you assume the decisions were bad, attack the people who made those decisions and demand that they admit they screwed up. 

In today’s volatile, uncertain, complex, chaotic and ambiguous world very often people have to make decisions with limited information, in tight time windows. They usually make the best decisions they can, with the information they have, knowing it will be second guessed if the outcome if less than ideal. 

Even when people have time to make decisions they are often presented with large volumes of data, and sometimes there is conflicting data. The “experts” often cannot agree on the best course of action and as a result they offer conflicting opinions and advice. At some point someone has to make a decision based on the best information they have at the time and sometimes they have to choose between two less desirable options. 

If you are in a position to do so, conduct After Action Reviews on a regular basis to gain insight into the decision making process that led to the outcome, good or bad. These are not meant to find fault or lay blame, they are meant to create learning opportunities so everyone can grow and improve their decision-making skills. 

If you are not in a position to do this then take a breath, take a step back and assume good intent until you get the facts to determine otherwise. After all, that is what you would want from others. 

What’s Important Now? Be cautious of judging the quality of decisions based solely on the outcome. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: You get to choose. Choose well.

“To make a difference is not a matter of accident, a matter of casual occurrence of the tides. People choose to make a difference.”

Maya Angelou

“You become elite by choice, not by chance.”

Lauren Johnson

“Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives - choice, not chance, determines your destiny.”

Aristotle

“Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice.

It is not a thing to be waited for; it is a thing to be achieved.”

William Jennings Bryan

"Be careful the environment you choose for it will shape you; be careful the friends you choose for you will become like them."

W. Clement Stone


“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” 
Roy T. Bennett

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms - to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way”

Victor E. Frankl

What’s Important Now? Life if full of choices. Let W.I.N. help guide you and choose well. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Are you making progress?

“Are you making progress?” is a question I heard someone ask the other day. We could ask the progress question, or we could ask process questions such as:

• Are you continually working on improving your mind, body and craft? 

• Are you committed to being a little better tomorrow than you are today?

• Are you focused on small incremental daily improvements?

• Are you committing at least 1% of your day (14 minutes and 27 seconds) to self-improvement? 

• Are you reading for an average of 10 minutes a day?

• Are you focused on effort and process?

• Are you building a Growth Mindset?

• Are you striving to learn, grow and improve?

If you answered yes to any of these questions then you likely answered yes to many of these questions. If you were engaging in the growth process then the answer to the question about progress would be yes. 

What’s Important Now? Stay committed to effort and process. Focus on what you control and Control the Controllable. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Remember Rule #2, Embrace, Look, Dare

Last week I wrote about the importance of controlling the controllable. What can be helpful with that is to remember the following:

Rule #2 – No Whining, No Complaining, No Excuses

Embrace the Pursuit of Excellence in Everything You Do

Embrace the Struggle

Embrace the Suck

Look for the Learning

Look for the Good 

Dare to Be Great

Life is full of ups and down, struggles and successes, challenges, obstacle and opportunities. There are times you will think to yourself, “This sucks.” You live and work in a world of complexity, chaos, uncertainty, ambiguity and volatility.  Life can beat you down or lift you up based on the choices you make and the attitude you take towards it. You can be a problem solver, or just be a complainer and problem identifier. You get to choose your attitude and your response. Choose well.

What’s Important Now? Remember Rule #2, Embrace, Look, Dare and Control the Controllable. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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W.I.N. Wednesday: Control the controllable.

If you have been reading this blog for a while you know that both my sons are in the hospitality industry. My oldest son Jesse, and his business partner Jeff, own two boutique wine stores, a restaurant, a cocktail bar, a sandwich shop in a local microbrewery and an online barware and glassware business. My other son Cody owns five restaurants and a burrito bar in a local microbrewery. 

The hospitality industry is a tough industry and has gotten even tougher in the last 18 months of the pandemic. The lessons I continue to learn from both Jesse and Cody are:

1.    Focus on what you control.

2.    Control the controllable.

It is easy to get caught up on things outside of my control. I don’t control COVID. I don’t control the rules and regulations implemented by governing bodies to try and deal with the pandemic where I live or where I am looking to do business. I don’t control the border restrictions or rules for cross border traffic. I don’t control the flight schedule with the airlines. I don’t control reduced services at hotels while traveling for business. I don’t control gym closures or restrictions. 

I do control my attitude and my choices. I control the choices I make regarding my health. I control what I choose to eat and whether or not I choose to workout regardless of gym closures. I control my preparation. I control the choice to travel for business or to stay home. I control whether I read or engage in personal growth activities even day. I control how I treat people who are simply trying to follow, and possibly enforce the rules that someone else put in place. I control how I treat people in the service industry who are doing the best they can, especially given that they are often understaffed. 

When I focus on the things outside of my control I get frustrated and angry. Focusing on what I control and controlling the controllable brings a sense of calm and focus. Controlling the controllable is simple, but not always easy. It is however, in my control. When I lose focus I am fortunate to be able to look to Jesse and Cody for inspiration, as well as for good food and wine.

What’s Important Now? Control the controllable. 

Take care.

Brian Willis

www.lifesmostpowerfulquestion.com. 

ONE QUESTION BRINGING FOCUS AND CLARITY IN THE CHAOS AND COMPLEXITY OF TODAY'S WORLD.

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